How You Might’ve Found Johnny America #31: February, 2006

Using a deadly combination of custom spyware and server “cookies,” every month the Johnny America Internet Team tracks which search engine queries lead visitors to this web site. Why the search engines send us these world wide web travelers, we do not know.

Our top searches by subject, expressed as percentages:

  • Of or relating to German cannibal Armin Meiwes or cannibalism in general: 22%
  • Brother-sister incest: methods for inducing, regrets relating to, pictures of: 15%
  • Hobosexuals/Hobosexuality: definition of and photo-documentation depicting: 11%
  • Telekinetic powers, methods for obtaining, questions regarding the reality of: 6%
  • Dancing techniques: “The Sprinkler,” “The Lawn Mower”: 5%
  • Of or relating to Johnny America or authors featured by: 4%
  • Dennis the menace, in general and as he relates to neighbor Mr. Wilson: 3%
  • Fried chicken, and Burger King “Chicken Fries,” reviews of: 2%
  • Various anatomicals “muscular”: legs (women’s), abdominal muscles (whoever’s!): 2%
  • Other: 30%
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