Just Ask James: The Economy

What’s great about James Spillane is that if you have a question about how to drunkenly punch someone in the face, start a huge bar fight, have the cops come, then make it look like the person that you punched is at fault because you are mentally handicapped, he knows the answer.

Dear James,

What do you think about the economy?


Sweet Melinda,

You must have read my last post about not saying much and asking simple questions. Don’t get me wrong, I like it because I feel like I am finally getting real questions that I have to answer and not just a group of people that want to get published on this obscure web site… and this subject is important.

I don’t know about you, but I dedicate a lot of time to public radio here in Kodiak. Have you ever just sat back for a day and counted the number of times that you hear “the economy” mentioned? Do this tomorrow, I dare you. Now, take this word and replace it with other words that are important to you, perhaps “mother,” “father,” perhaps “child.” What was it before economy, “terrorist?” What was it before terrorist, “communist?” “Vietcong,” “nuclear arms,” “Russian invasion,” “the Jews,” “the blacks,” “the Irish,” “the whatever.” It starts to seem like waves and waves of bullshit that we have to swim through, and Melinda, I bet you can swim pretty well.

Imagine yourself swimming towards a raft of sorts — there are few out there in the hungry ocean, one is “the economy,” one is “terrorist,” one is perhaps everything you have ever known… I bet you dollars to donuts where you are heading.

Call your family up now, tell ’em you had a little wine, but let em know how much you love them. And tell them I said hi!


You Might Consider Visiting

Our Online Shop


Bog »

« Trinidad in Three Pieces