How You Might’ve Found Johnny America #50: November, 2011

Using a deadly combination of custom spyware and server “cookies,” every month the Johnny America Internet Team tracks which search engine queries lead visitors to this web site. Why the search engines send us these world wide web travelers, we do not know.
  • Browsing through our server log’s ‘Referring Sites’ list, we were surprised to see an uptick in Russian prostitution and “match-making” sites sending visitors to our way. Our sympathies lie with the laissez-faire and libertine, admittedly, so all we ask of our new Russkiy friends is that they Пожалуйста, воздержитесь от мастурбации на нашем сайте!

  • As usual, almost four percent of visitors found us looking for “handlebar moustache jokes.” We do not understand the world’s fascination with handlebar moustaches and jokes regarding them, but we’re happy to welcome the traffic.

  • Our analysis shows that the search terms, “Cajun sexy,” “sexy Cajun,” and “booty Cajun,” have declined in popularity, while “dog vagina,” “dog’s vagina,” “vagina dog,” and “KFC Dale Earnhardt Jr. Collectible Bucket,” are increasingly popular.

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